Saint Bernadette's Memory Garden
| God looked around his garden and found an empty place,
He then looked down upon the earth and saw your tired face.
He put his arms around you and lifted you to rest.
God's garden must be beautiful; He always takes the best.
He knew that you were suffering, He knew you were in pain.
He knew that you would never get well on earth again.
He saw the road was getting rough and the hills were hard to climb.
So He closed your weary eyelids and whispered, 'Peace be Thine'.
It broke our hearts to lose you but you didn't go alone,
For part of us went with you, the day God called you home.
Please add your message to our Memory Garden. It can be a message of hope and comfort or it can be in memory of your loved one. Thank you to those who have contacted us already. To share emotions and stories is so helpful for our healing. No names are included unless you especially request they are. |
| "When I lost my husband, I thought my life was over. I was 52 and we adored each other, we had lovely intimate times together and also we enjoyed an active and fun social life. I really believed our friends would stop inviting me out because I had it in my mind that they would find me awkward to be with. I was pleasantly surprised just how many of my friends still requested my company. I loved to see them but found driving home on my own hard. I had no one to discuss the evening with on the drive home. Sounds pathetic really but it is nice to talk over what has gone on that night with someone. It isn't until that has gone, you realise you did it so much chatting in the first place! I think I talked more but he always listened. A few years on and the loneliness is still there but I have learned to cope better with it! Things do get better. Nothing is ever the same, but I suppose it gets easier to deal with. It would have been our 40th wedding anniversary this year and that brings everything back. We used to talk of what we would do. I will celebrate it with my children and grandchildren, low key but it will be marked. Sometimes I can get on with it and accept that this is my lot and other times, I feel robbed of my life with the only man I have ever loved. I look at some of the marriages in our circle of friends and some are unhappy, and I think... at least you still have each other! Sometimes I have to stop myself shouting STOP COMPLAINING - my husband is dead! I know I had less years of a happy married life but I wouldn't change it for more years of unhappiness in a marriage. I miss him and I always will but my marriage was wonderful and I must never forget that even when I think how unfair life is." |
| "Mum was diagnosed with dementia 5 years before she died. Those years were some of the darkest we had as a family. Visiting your Mother, who chose your name, who taught you to walk and talk and walked you to school then to see her unable to feed herself or do anything for herself and realising she has no idea who you are is devastating. We have always said that we mourned the loss of her twice. Once when we lost her mentally and then again when she died. It is like experiencing the pain of bereavement twice. Mum was a great gardener and loved azaleas so a picture of azaleas for her would be so nice, please. I love you Mum. Rest in peace." |
 | "To talk to strangers through the web is the way I find good. It has been 3 years now since she died and the general thought is that I should be over it. I don't cry all the time anymore but I still want to talk all the time about her! She was wonderful and my rock." |
 | "The wind is close to shedding her winter coat,
The sun dances a little longer with the Light
The trees are near to labour in the the birthing of bud and leaf
The flowers are impatient with the soil
but the lyrics of of the music that springs sings
has not yet filled the manuscripts of changing time." Fr Andrew Gentry
Grief too has its own winter and spring but there is no season measured by day or month nor day or night. It has its own embrace and letting go. Be gentle with yourself and let healing be near and sometimes far.
Presence is more than the immediate and less than the eternal. Peace.
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| | I like this web site because it has made me realise I am ok to feel this sad. I sometimes think I am going mad but losing someone is terrible. I get tired of feeling terrible. I like the rose poem. Did you write it? NO! It is from a card I was sent when my Father died and I have hung onto it. I couldn't tell who did write it but it is beautiful. I am so glad you contacted us and please keep in touch now you have found us. With love from Nicolax |
 | Every time I see a robin in my garden I think my husband has come to visit me. Sometimes a robin flies in through the kitchen window and then later that day I get some nice news. I know it sounds silly but it gves me hope that he has lived on somehow. When I am gardening, although I never used to do the garden as it was always his job, and a robin hops by my feet I smile to myself thinking maybe I am not planting something in the right place!" |
| | Please fill in the form below and your stories will be anonymously posted into the Memory Garden. If you would prefer, you need not give your real name, however every single person's confidentiality is treated with respect and integrity at all times.
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